r/oddlysatisfying • u/DifficultyHead5862 • 14h ago
meticulous process of hand-pollinating a giant pumpkin
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u/WeeSingInSillyville 14h ago
This is just the plot of Mama Mia
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u/nicoznico 13h ago edited 12h ago
Nbr1, Nbr2 and Nbr3:
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u/amcclurk21 11h ago
Iāve never seen Mamma Mia but your gif and the comment above it are concerning lol
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u/eyesotope86 11h ago
When a daughter loves a mom, but doesn't know who her dad is, she has the three most likely candidates meet up and rub their pollen all over the stigma.
I think I lost the plot somewhere.
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u/KickBlue22 11h ago
At the end they put the mom's hair up in a bun and wrap it tightly with a kind of gauze netting. Then they put a bucket over her head because it's going to be a hot day.
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u/eyesotope86 11h ago
Everyone knows Mamma Mia is a rom-com. That scene is already assumed.
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u/sonofzeal 10h ago
Daughter who's getting married discovers her single mom was.... uh.... living her best life around when she (daughter) would have been concieved. Hunts down three dudes who all might be her dad, invites them all to her wedding without telling mom, by pretending it's the mom inviting them. All three show up because they all miss the mom. Hijinks ensue.
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u/Julio-Dewey-Crayfish 9h ago
The comedic lengths people will go through instead of just requesting a DNA test.
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u/Terradactyl87 5h ago
There are rarely choreographed musical numbers involved in DNA tests though. When's the last time you saw a DNA reveal with a 30 person flipper dance on a pier?
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u/pj7891sm 14h ago
Where's the NSFW tag?
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u/DifficultyHead5862 14h ago
*OF - Only FruitsĀ
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u/Direct-Quiet-5817 14h ago
Of Pumkin - praise be, under his eyes
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u/Savecutiepie 13h ago
May the lord open
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u/LemmyLola 13h ago
May the gourd open
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u/Swag_Attack 13h ago
Fucking pumpkin bukkake
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u/its_just_flesh 12h ago
Gonna have to take it on Maury to find out who the father was
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u/kkillbite 12h ago
Reveal that stigma followed by that rubbing/Q-tip-action made me laugh like a 4th-grader š
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u/DonGold60 12h ago edited 12h ago
Was it really necessary to circumcise the males? Kind of destroys the mood.
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u/Capraos 12h ago
Imagine getting impregnated with severed dicks.
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u/KA_Mechatronik 11h ago
Ah, the octopus method.
Some species have a specialized limb that they tear off and present to the female.
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u/its_like_a-marker 12h ago
This is sadistic. Where is the consent for this gang bang and mutilation?
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u/dawgblogit 12h ago
You just watched a man..Ā chop the proverbial male parts off 3 other males and force inseminate a female with them...
And youre all why the NSFW tag?
Just how sick are you?
/s
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u/These_Ad_1677 14h ago
Yeah ofcourse you gotta cool it down after
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u/AnAcctWithoutPurpose 13h ago
Aftercare is very important after an intense session!
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u/theglove 8h ago
Well I for one did not expect to see a forced gangbang on a pumpkin this morning.
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u/SolinaMoon 7h ago
š Thank you for putting this so succinctly!
Never thought I'd feel weird about watching a gardening video, but I was feeling a bit š about this one. I hope the way that flower opened up was a display of enthusiastic consent!
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u/ReverendDizzle 10h ago
"A gang bang and aftercare? Uggggh some girls have all the luck."
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u/pipsqueakpanda4 6h ago edited 5h ago
[r/brandnewsentence](r/brandnewsentence)
Edit: this was supposed to be a reply to the āforced pumpkin gangbangā comment below, but this works too lol
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u/AnAcctWithoutPurpose 14h ago
That is strangely NSFW... and also, discarding the males casually to the side after extracting all the pollen.. š
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u/DimbyTime 14h ago
The male plants werenāt killed
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u/AnAcctWithoutPurpose 14h ago
Just the male parts.
(Actually, I am not familiar with pumpkins, are the male and female pumpkin separate plants, like papaya trees?)
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u/CD274 14h ago
No they're on the same plant but usually male flowers grow first so initially you get a lot of flowers that go nowhere
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u/Rynagogo 12h ago
So it just nuts on itself to make a pumpkin?
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u/SalsaRice 11h ago
Some plants can self-pollenize, some can't and requires insects/people/etc to get the pollen from another plant of their same species.
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u/dankbearbear 13h ago
So basically i've just seen pumpkin masturbation
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u/Lovesick_Octopus 10h ago
Didn't look consensual at all, especially for the guys getting their nads cut off.
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u/NorthernSpankMonkey 13h ago
Pumpkins are monoecious, male and female flowers are found on the same plants. Cannabis is dioecious, male and female flowers are on different plants. Apple trees are hermaphroditic their flowers bear both male and female parts, this configuration is also called perfect.
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u/Evenmoardakka 11h ago
its perfect because if all else fails, it can just go fuck itself
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u/purplezart 10h ago
The original meaning of perfect was much closer to "totally complete" than the contemporary meaning of "flawless."
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u/StarwardStranger 14h ago
Yeah it just got their genitail cut off, but it'll grow a new one next year.
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u/ShadeBeing 14h ago
Man I wish I could grow a new peen every year. Mines got ptsd. Do with those letters what you will.
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u/newuser336 13h ago
Now Iām imagining aliens falsely assuming we reproduce like plants so they start cutting everyoneās ā¦
Iām gonna stop there.
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u/Fritz_Klyka 13h ago
Post pollination clarity hits hard, theyll need some time to think about their life choices.
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u/Gr1ml0ck 14h ago
Ran a train on that blossom.
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u/DifficultyHead5862 14h ago
she's for the garden.
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u/lysergic_818 13h ago
The hoe isn't the only one taking care of business out there.
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u/claudiazo 13h ago
I feel like Iām watching an intimate moment. This feels wrongā¦
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u/CMDA 14h ago
Did I just watch pumpkin pr0n?
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u/DifficultyHead5862 14h ago
ig pumpkin orgy wasn't on ur bingo card?
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u/DoctorBlock 12h ago
Even worse dubcon orgy gore.
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u/Hollow--- 12h ago
Add in necrophilia since he gave the males the snip before pollinating. So dubcon necrophiliac forced circumcision threesome orgy?
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u/DrivellingFool 13h ago
You just watched a pumpkin getting a train run on her.
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u/Nforcer524 12h ago
It's called porn. You're allowed to write it, no need to censor yourself.
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u/Sufficient_Contact52 14h ago
https://giphy.com/gifs/2S3Aj8OeKtf0c
The bees over here like
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u/matchesmalone81 14h ago
Im not horticulturally inclined in any way, but I cant believe the number of people here saying "duhhh...let nature do it". FFS the title says it all, hes trying to create big, nay, Giant pumpkins.
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u/avdpos 12h ago
Exactly.
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u/I_dont_thinks 10h ago
People taking the job of the birds and the bees to make special pumpkin babies.
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u/britannicker 14h ago
Where are the bees?
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u/Choko1987 13h ago
The point here is too keep the same genetic for seed production, that's why he close the female flower, to avoid pollen coming with the bees
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u/zenunseen 13h ago
So dumb question, but the males and female are entirely separate plants, correct? One plant won't produce both male and female? Watching this made me realize how little i know about the fascinating subject of plant sex
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u/Choko1987 12h ago
On one plant you have male and female flowers, but if you want to create a hybrid, you can take the male flowers on another plant. When I was younger, I worked in a greenhouse doing that with melon flowers. The greenhouse is to avoid bees and other insects, so you don't need to close the flowers
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u/mc_thunderfart 12h ago
Depends on the plant. Some produce Male and female parts. Some are divided between Male and female.
Cannabis for example.
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u/Greenwing 12h ago
This is something you do when you want to control the genetics of the cross. Otherwise it's considered an open pollination and you only know half the genetics. (I am making this comment as someone who has spent hundreds of dollars on giant pumpkin seeds.)
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u/maynardangelo 14h ago
When he zipped up the males... I felt that...
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u/seanprime 13h ago
Canāt believe we didnāt see any
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u/Careful-Lettuce9239 12h ago
Lol. The thought of someone getting to the end of a pr0n and going "WTF? Where's the rest of the story? I WANNA SEE THE BABY!" is hilarious.
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u/wackbirds 14h ago
I've done this with pumpkins and zucchini (you can use the males from any squash/gourd family member for this and then if you saved the seeds from the offspring, THEY will be a hybrid) and it's exactly like this except I didn't have the netting system or go as rough as this guy. Not that I'm saying he's not doing it right by the way, I'm saying I'm not as experienced
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u/veganmomPA 13h ago
How do you tell male vs female? Given the decline in bee populations, even home gardeners may have to learn to do this. Thank you.
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u/Greenwing 12h ago
For everything in the squash family, the female flowers have what looks like the baby fruit under it. A giant pumpkin will have a round ball under the flower (about the size of a ping pong ball by the time it blooms). A cucumber will have what looks like a mini cucumber under it. The males are just a flower on a stick.Ā
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u/mangomussolinimi 14h ago
Cant you just use insects?
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u/SteelyDanny 14h ago
Thatās not horny enough
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u/mangomussolinimi 14h ago
Cant you just use horny insects?
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u/ashbelero 13h ago
Real answer I think itās because theyāre breeding a very specific kind. There are some gardeners who work hard to grow the largest one they possibly can and enter them in competitions or otherwise sell them. This dude likely has it down to a science and letting nature take its course would ruin the result heās going for.
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u/Greenwing 12h ago
It won't matter for the pumpkin he grows this year, but matters for the seeds that this pumpkin will make. Serious growers plan their crosses and if they don't have room to grow two full plants, will sometimes grow a small one just for the male flowers.Ā
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u/GeneralPatten 13h ago
Not when you want to ensure the giant pumpkin is pollinated with another giant pumpkin's pollen. Insects could be carrying pollen from zucchini and it would pollinate the pumpkin. You'd still get a pumpkin as a result, but it would not be as large and the resulting seeds from that pumpkin would result in a hybrid of pumpkin and zucchini.
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u/-NewYork- 13h ago
Sir, this is a Wendy's. We don't want to hear your interspecies porn fanfics.
(But honestly, this is all super interesting. I'm also a garden enjoyer. My sister is a pumpkin gardener, and she tried a giant one a few times, I think 80kg was the record).
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u/newstarburst 13h ago
Theres a lot of times you will only get one female flower and 10 males or 1 male and 10 females, its very common in the home gardening community to have to hand pollinate these squash plants just to make sure youre getting pollination. This massive plant might only have a singular female at that time and I assume you want maximum grow time for large pumpkins, so hand pollination ensures this one flower gets pollinated. I also assume for giant pumpkins, you want to make absolutely sure youre getting giant pumpkin pollination and not just any random pumpkin pollen that someone could be growing near you, which is probably why he wraps up the female to prevent bugs from cross pollination.
Also, he ties up the males to prevent any bugs to get to them to save their pollen for hand pollination, ill definitely be using that this year.
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u/Antoinefdu 13h ago
That would be missing the point. He's not just trying to pollinate 2 random pumpkin plants, he's trying to control exactly which 2 plants are being combined to produce the right type of pumpkin. That's why he's holding the flowers shut at the beginning of the video: He doesn't want any random pollination to occur and mess up his experiment.
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u/Heavy-Attorney-9054 13h ago
ELI5: how does this contribute to "giant"?
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u/Wolfie-Woo784 12h ago
Genetics. These pumpkin plants are the result of the years of selective breeding for larger and larger fruit. By controlling which male flowers pollinate the female, the farmer can ensure that both parent plants have the right genes to produce the right size of pumpkin. It's similar to picking 2 dogs you want to breed together to get the certain traits you want in puppies.
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u/-Jesus-Of-Nazareth- 14h ago
Hopefully somebody can answer this question. Does that mean the female plant can have fruits from all 3 males, or does only one succeed?
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u/North-Example5687 13h ago
The fruit develops from the female flower, so only one fruit, but each seed would be the product of the female and one of the 3 males.
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u/Disinfectant-Addict 12h ago edited 11h ago
My uncle did this with his pumpkins and my dad made fun of him for it all summer. But he got huge pumpkins that year and that Christmas my father received several jars labeled 'hand-fucked pumpkins'š